Last Saturday morning, I woke up and had some time with the Lord, praying and reading the Word. Then, I headed out to go to where I minister to South Asians. I live in Manhattan and need to take a subway to Queens in order to do this. As usual, I was running late.
At the subway station, the subway was running late. "Great, just what I needed!", I thought sarcastically. While waiting for the train, I overheard a lady on her cell phone. She was making a call to someone with whom she had an appointment to explain that she would be late. I remember thinking that, even though she disliked being late, she sounded patient. Patient Lady seemed like a nice person.
Well, the subway finally came and it was kind of full, but Patient Lady and I both got on. She went one way on the train and I another. There were only 2 available seats and they were next to each other. Right next to one of these seats was a drunk man. His empty whisky bottle was sticking out of his coat pocket, his hat and glasses were on the subway floor near his feet and he was completely passed out.
Thankful that I did not have to sit directly next to Passed Out Drunk Man, I sat one seat over. After sitting I realized that he was swaying with the motion of the train. People sitting across from the man were watching him sway towards me. All I could think were things like: "I hope he doesn't fall onto me!" or "What if he vomits, or has lice or something? I can't go do ministry if I am dirty."
Then it happened! He fell onto me! Even though we had one seat between us, his head fell right onto my shoulder! I winced and gently pushed him back up. He briefly woke up, looked around and passed out again. Now, I was living in fear of him falling again. Everyone was looking at me. I imagined that some looked at me with pity and others with mild curiosity. No one spoke. They all just watched my little drama and I knew they all could tell what I was thinking because I had zero poker face.
At the next stop, one of the girls sitting across from me left the subway car, I immediately got up and grabbed her seat. Then, something amazing happened. Patient Lady came down to our side of the train and sat RIGHT NEXT to Passed Out Drunk Man! She picked up his hat and glasses and gently spoke to him, "I believe these are yours.". As he sleepily awoke, she handed him his things. He took them from her and passed out again. She then laid a hand on his shoulder - yes she voluntarily touched him - and she appeared to be praying!
During the remainder of my subway ride, he fell on her several times - as he had done with me, but she would gently sit him upright and continue sitting there and pat his arm with her hand. Patient Lady looked like she was in absolute peace. Our eyes met briefly, and she looked at me with total peace and zero judgment. This made me feel really bad - I felt like I deserved a judgmental stare for being so self-consumed, not a patient, peaceful look.
And THAT is when Jesus' story of the Good Samaritan came to mind. You know the parable where the beat up man is in the gutter and all of the religious people - the priest and rabbi - walk to the OTHER SIDE OF THE SUBWAY- I mean, the other side of the road? And I suddenly realized that I was Religious Lady running off to "do ministry" who was too busy to be contaminated by a drunk man. But Patient Lady - who I now call the "Subway Samaritan" - was also late for a meeting, but she took time to show love and care to Passed Out Drunk Man.
I realized that I had just lived a parable but I was playing the role of the ugliest character! I didn't want the Passed Out Drunk Man to touch me; Subway Samaritan willingly touched him. I didn't want to sit near him; Subway Samaritan willingly sat RIGHT NEXT to him. I was too selfish to think about him; Subway Samaritan let go of herself to show kindness to him. And Subway Samaritan did not look at me with judgment. She treated me with the same patience she showed to Passed Out Drunk Man.
So, my prayer is that I would be someone who lives ministry instead of someone who does ministry. I want to be someone who sees opportunities that God gives me to love and care for people. I pray that I would especially take notice of these opportunities when they do not fit into my schedule or when they are unpleasant or risky.
And I thank the Lord for showing me that I am often not like the Good Samaritan, but more like the busy religious people in that parable. And I also thank Him for looking at me gently, just like the Subway Samaritan did. I thank Him for being just as patient with me as she was with both me and Passed Out Drunk Man.
I pray that the Lord would keep Transforming Tammy into the image of His Son! Amen.
Wednesday, January 29, 2014
Wednesday, August 7, 2013
How God answered my Crazy Prayer
OK - so my husband and I are living as full-time Christian workers in New York City. We will be working with immigrants, teaching English and teaching Bible Studies and sharing the love of Jesus in any other ways that will serve an immigrant population. I wanted to take a moment to chronicle our journey.
Prior to 2012, my husband and I had been feeling a tugging, a gentle calling from God to work for Him full-time. This tugging has been there on and off for many years. In fact, from 1993-1996, my hubby went to seminary to prepare for this calling. After seminary, we felt that the Lord wanted us to wait and not go into ministry full-time.
So we waited, and waited, and waited.
Around 2010, we started sensing that the wait was coming to an end, but what does that mean? What did the next step look like? How do you jump into full-time ministry? What are we supposed to do? work at an orphanage? work for a Christian relief agency? go overseas? work stateside?
So, we prayed, and prayed, and prayed.
And this is what happened:
January 2012: I called my friend Maya and asked her to pray with me that the year 2012 would be the "Year of the Breakthrough"! What I meant by this, is that serious steps would be made to enter into full-time Christian ministry. My husband was working a full-time gig as a graphic artist and he was the part-time Outreach/Evangelism Director at our church. I asked her to pray with me that my husband would get laid off and that he would get a severance package that was comfortable enough for us to live for awhile without a paycheck.
Crazy! Right? Well, let me explain: We were living a nice upper-middle class life. We don't know how that happened, we sort of woke up and there it was. 2 kids, 2 story house, 2 car garage, 4 bathrooms etc. Those things can be hard to walk away from. But what is even harder to walk away from is a secure job. Especially when the news is constantly reminding you that the economy is bad. So, I felt that the only way we would have the courage to walk away is if God FORCED us to walk away by taking away the paycheck so that we could seriously look at other options. So, I asked Maya to join me in my crazy prayer.
January-July 2012: Maya and I prayed that my hubby would be laid off. We prayed for a severance package. We prayed that if God wanted our family in full-time ministry that he would make it crystal clear by taking away secular employment.
July 27, 2012: MY HUSBAND GOT LAID OF!!!! The exact same day, Frederick County schools calls me and offers me my choice of three Spanish teaching positions. (I had not called them, I had not contacted them, they had my name on file from me teaching for them 3 years previously.) This job was only 20 hours a week, but it included full medical benefits. God was providing for all of our needs and we both sensed that the Lord was up to something. And instead of panicking, my husband was at peace. "I think God is up to something," he said. It's not every day that a man gets laid off and his wife gets offered a job that she never even applied for in a job market that is abyssmal.
August 2012: I say yes to the teaching position. My husband gets a very generous severance package. I find out that I have 2 weeks to get certified in Spanish if I want the medical benefits. The only certification test available is geared at native speakers. More crazy prayers. The Lord helps me pass - miraculously! I am now a certified teacher in the state of Maryland!
September 2012-December 2012: I am teaching. My husband is still running the Outreach program at the church - working 8 hours a week. We begin seriously looking into all sorts of mission agencies and Christian organizations. We find out that most mission agencies will NOT send you overseas if you have teenagers. OK, so I guess we are supposed to stay in the States? But we have a heart for cross-cultural ministry and for taking the gospel to people who have little chance of hearing about God's love. Can we do that in the states?
Then Hurricane Sandy hits New York City and my husband organizes a trip to do relief work. 18 of us head to the Big Apple. We stay at a Baptist Mission House. In that short trip, my husband and I both walked away impressed with the work these people were doing in New York CIty. Not just hurricane relief, but church planting and outreach among peoples of all nations. The Baptist Association in New York has churches that speak Spanish, Creole, Vietnamese, Filipino, Hindi, Ethiopian etc.
December 2012: My husband is on the New York Baptist Association's website and finds out about an organization that is working with immigrants to New York who are from countries that don't readily let Christian missionaries in.
January 2013: Our family goes to New York for a long weekend to check out the work that this group is doing. My husband and I both love it! We pray and feel like this is the group for us.
February 2013: We get assessed to determine if we can be missionaries with this group. This assessment included psychological testing, personality profiles etc. It was intense. And we were approved to be missionaries!
March 2013-May 2013: We start raising support to move to New York for one year of training. In only two months, the LORD provided enough funds for us to live in one of the most expensive places in the whole world for an entire year! Absolutely amazing.
And so here I am, sitting in our teeny-tiny, incredibly expensive (but newly renovated) apartment in the Upper West Side. 3 blocks from Harlem. 5 blocks from Columbia University. 3 blocks from Central Park. On one end of my street is a Dominican neighborhood. The other end seems to consist of Jewish old timers and yuppies and college students from places like China and Saudi Arabia. I buy fruit from a lady from Bangladesh. I speak Spanish almost every time I leave my house.
I am living among the nations, praying that my light will shine. And I love it.
And I am so thankful that God answers crazy prayers.
Prior to 2012, my husband and I had been feeling a tugging, a gentle calling from God to work for Him full-time. This tugging has been there on and off for many years. In fact, from 1993-1996, my hubby went to seminary to prepare for this calling. After seminary, we felt that the Lord wanted us to wait and not go into ministry full-time.
So we waited, and waited, and waited.
Around 2010, we started sensing that the wait was coming to an end, but what does that mean? What did the next step look like? How do you jump into full-time ministry? What are we supposed to do? work at an orphanage? work for a Christian relief agency? go overseas? work stateside?
So, we prayed, and prayed, and prayed.
And this is what happened:
January 2012: I called my friend Maya and asked her to pray with me that the year 2012 would be the "Year of the Breakthrough"! What I meant by this, is that serious steps would be made to enter into full-time Christian ministry. My husband was working a full-time gig as a graphic artist and he was the part-time Outreach/Evangelism Director at our church. I asked her to pray with me that my husband would get laid off and that he would get a severance package that was comfortable enough for us to live for awhile without a paycheck.
Crazy! Right? Well, let me explain: We were living a nice upper-middle class life. We don't know how that happened, we sort of woke up and there it was. 2 kids, 2 story house, 2 car garage, 4 bathrooms etc. Those things can be hard to walk away from. But what is even harder to walk away from is a secure job. Especially when the news is constantly reminding you that the economy is bad. So, I felt that the only way we would have the courage to walk away is if God FORCED us to walk away by taking away the paycheck so that we could seriously look at other options. So, I asked Maya to join me in my crazy prayer.
January-July 2012: Maya and I prayed that my hubby would be laid off. We prayed for a severance package. We prayed that if God wanted our family in full-time ministry that he would make it crystal clear by taking away secular employment.
July 27, 2012: MY HUSBAND GOT LAID OF!!!! The exact same day, Frederick County schools calls me and offers me my choice of three Spanish teaching positions. (I had not called them, I had not contacted them, they had my name on file from me teaching for them 3 years previously.) This job was only 20 hours a week, but it included full medical benefits. God was providing for all of our needs and we both sensed that the Lord was up to something. And instead of panicking, my husband was at peace. "I think God is up to something," he said. It's not every day that a man gets laid off and his wife gets offered a job that she never even applied for in a job market that is abyssmal.
August 2012: I say yes to the teaching position. My husband gets a very generous severance package. I find out that I have 2 weeks to get certified in Spanish if I want the medical benefits. The only certification test available is geared at native speakers. More crazy prayers. The Lord helps me pass - miraculously! I am now a certified teacher in the state of Maryland!
September 2012-December 2012: I am teaching. My husband is still running the Outreach program at the church - working 8 hours a week. We begin seriously looking into all sorts of mission agencies and Christian organizations. We find out that most mission agencies will NOT send you overseas if you have teenagers. OK, so I guess we are supposed to stay in the States? But we have a heart for cross-cultural ministry and for taking the gospel to people who have little chance of hearing about God's love. Can we do that in the states?
Then Hurricane Sandy hits New York City and my husband organizes a trip to do relief work. 18 of us head to the Big Apple. We stay at a Baptist Mission House. In that short trip, my husband and I both walked away impressed with the work these people were doing in New York CIty. Not just hurricane relief, but church planting and outreach among peoples of all nations. The Baptist Association in New York has churches that speak Spanish, Creole, Vietnamese, Filipino, Hindi, Ethiopian etc.
December 2012: My husband is on the New York Baptist Association's website and finds out about an organization that is working with immigrants to New York who are from countries that don't readily let Christian missionaries in.
January 2013: Our family goes to New York for a long weekend to check out the work that this group is doing. My husband and I both love it! We pray and feel like this is the group for us.
February 2013: We get assessed to determine if we can be missionaries with this group. This assessment included psychological testing, personality profiles etc. It was intense. And we were approved to be missionaries!
March 2013-May 2013: We start raising support to move to New York for one year of training. In only two months, the LORD provided enough funds for us to live in one of the most expensive places in the whole world for an entire year! Absolutely amazing.
And so here I am, sitting in our teeny-tiny, incredibly expensive (but newly renovated) apartment in the Upper West Side. 3 blocks from Harlem. 5 blocks from Columbia University. 3 blocks from Central Park. On one end of my street is a Dominican neighborhood. The other end seems to consist of Jewish old timers and yuppies and college students from places like China and Saudi Arabia. I buy fruit from a lady from Bangladesh. I speak Spanish almost every time I leave my house.
I am living among the nations, praying that my light will shine. And I love it.
And I am so thankful that God answers crazy prayers.
Tuesday, April 2, 2013
10 Reasons Kids Leave Church
I found this article interesting: http://marc5solas.com/2013/02/08/top-10-reasons-our-kids-leave-church/
Tuesday, January 29, 2013
Miracles!
"Why don't we see miracles today, the way they did in the Bible?" This question is often asked by both believers and skeptics alike. What people mean is not the miracle of salvation - but miracles like what we see in the Bible - the lame walking, the blind seeing etc.. As I get older, I am starting to beleive that we d see miracles every day - we just don't take note of them or remember them. So, I a starting to take note and I want to document a few of these miracles.
1. Last November, my mom had a suspicious "spot" on her mammogram. The doctors were concerned and scheduled and biopsy. Everyone started praying hard that this would not be cancer. When she went in for the biopsy, the doctors spent a long time before even cutting her. They looked perplexed. They rechecked the film that showed the spot. They looked again at her current reading. "We can't find the spot," they exclaimed. It was completely GONE!
2. My friend Nancy was infertile for 20 years. During that time, she and her husband adopted 7 kids! At age 41, her closed womb suddenly opened and she was pregnant and delivered a healthy baby boy! Everyone was amazed by the miracle. Then, at age 43, she got pregnant again and delivered another healthy baby boy! Everyone was even more amazed. Then last year, at age FORTY-SEVEN, that's right 47, she got pregnant and delivered another healthy baby boy!!!!! This after being completely infertile for years. As you know, most women with a history of good fertility can't get pregnant at age 47!
3. Twice in my life, I have had the honor of praying for people and see them healed - immediately. Once in a Brazilian favela (slum). Another time, when a lady at my church had baffled the doctors for 2 years. They couldn't figure out how to treat her debilitating illness. But, God healed both of these people.
What about you? Can you document any miracles? THINK and remember. It can be so easy to forget and not recount they times that God has intervened. It can be so easy to see a miracle and then go on with life as usual. Let's remember the times when God intervenes.
1. Last November, my mom had a suspicious "spot" on her mammogram. The doctors were concerned and scheduled and biopsy. Everyone started praying hard that this would not be cancer. When she went in for the biopsy, the doctors spent a long time before even cutting her. They looked perplexed. They rechecked the film that showed the spot. They looked again at her current reading. "We can't find the spot," they exclaimed. It was completely GONE!
2. My friend Nancy was infertile for 20 years. During that time, she and her husband adopted 7 kids! At age 41, her closed womb suddenly opened and she was pregnant and delivered a healthy baby boy! Everyone was amazed by the miracle. Then, at age 43, she got pregnant again and delivered another healthy baby boy! Everyone was even more amazed. Then last year, at age FORTY-SEVEN, that's right 47, she got pregnant and delivered another healthy baby boy!!!!! This after being completely infertile for years. As you know, most women with a history of good fertility can't get pregnant at age 47!
3. Twice in my life, I have had the honor of praying for people and see them healed - immediately. Once in a Brazilian favela (slum). Another time, when a lady at my church had baffled the doctors for 2 years. They couldn't figure out how to treat her debilitating illness. But, God healed both of these people.
What about you? Can you document any miracles? THINK and remember. It can be so easy to forget and not recount they times that God has intervened. It can be so easy to see a miracle and then go on with life as usual. Let's remember the times when God intervenes.
Thursday, January 24, 2013
Really?
After yesterday's post, I have found myself asking - do I really not care about people? Am I really that selfish - or did I exaggerate to try and make a point? In my heart of hearts, I care about the needs of others. I even give to them. I think that what struck me about the passage in Acts is the sacrificial element of the early disciple's giving. Selling possessions for others? That's pretty wild - and inspiring!
Really!
Really!
Wednesday, January 23, 2013
Challenging the staus quo
"So, when was the last time anyone here sold something so that someone in need could eat?"
That was the question Steve asked as a group of us ate dinner together last month. He was referring to Acts 2: 42-47 which reads:
They devoted themselves to the apostles’ teaching and to fellowship, to the breaking of bread and to prayer. Everyone was filled with awe at the many wonders and signs performed by the apostles. All the believers were together and had everything in common. They sold property and possessions to give to anyone who had need. Every day they continued to meet together in the temple courts. They broke bread in their homes and ate together with glad and sincere hearts, praising God and enjoying the favor of all the people. And the Lord added to their number daily those who were being saved.
When Steve asked this, we all just stared at him and finally someone replied, "Never". Someone else said something like, "I don't even think I have given up a luxory so that others could eat". Ouch. We all grimly agreed.
I have been thinking about all of the excuses I make for not following the examples of the early Christians. You know things like:
"It's a different time now"
"Didn't Jesus say that the poor will always be with you?"
"I mean I would end up poor if I gave it all away?"
"Be careful - you don't want to become a Communist!"
"Doesn't Jesus want me to have some happiness?"
"I worked hard for this possession!"
As Americans, we are the RICHEST people who have ever lived. If you look at things from a global scale, evangelical Americans are among the wealthiest demographic in the world. If this is true, why are their still children growing up on trash heaps in the Philippines? Why are their still people dying of famine? Why hasn't Haiti been rebuilt? I know that the answers are complicated. I know that some countries in the world have government structures that make it hard to give. I know that there is corruption in many parts of the world. I know that it's hard to know who to give to.
But I still think, that as a Christian, I can do more do help others. I think that the real reason that we are not doing more is that we just really don't want to help people . OR We are too consumed with our own lives to really think about giving so that others can eat, have shelter/clothes etc.
Here is a quote from Stephen Colbert - I don't agree with everything he says and I don't even know if how serious he was when he said this - but I think he is on to something here: “If this is going to be a Christian nation that doesn’t help the poor,
either we have to pretend that Jesus was just as selfish as we are, or
we’ve got to acknowledge that He commanded us to love the poor and serve
the needy without condition and then admit that we just don’t want to
do it.”
Mr. Colbert is talking about us corporately as a nation - and I am looking at giving on an individual/voluntary level but I think he's right about something - I don't give because I am selfish. Although I have dreams of being some sort of Mother Teresa - the truth that my budget often proves is that I want my best life now - even though the tenets of my faith teach that Jesus and HIS heavenly home are my reward.
Saturday, January 12, 2013
Pushing Books
My friend Mary is a Book Pusher. Some people push drugs. Others push agendas. Mary pushes books.
"Hey, Tammy, I got something for you," she'll say as she thrusts a book into my hands.
"Is it good?" I ask - already knowing the answer.
"It's good - it's real good," she says and walks away to pass out books to some other bibliovore wh can't wait to sink their teeth into some juicy, thought-provoking words.
The thing about a book pusher is that you can NEVER outdo them. You can NEVER pass them a book because when you try - they tell you that they have already read it or just got it and are about to read it.
But, I LOVE books - so this arrangement is fine by me. This relationship is working really well.
Another cool thing about Mary is that God has been whispering to her about the same issues He has been whispering to me about: How do we as American Middle Class Christians live authentic Christian lives that really show the love of Christ rather than just be a voting block or a subculture that is sequestered from the rest of the world? How do we live lives that are consistent with the WHOLE counsel of God - not just some portions of it?
If any of you are interested in these topics, then I would like to give you a booklist of some of the great books that I have read. Basically - I would like to push on you some of the books that Mary has pushed on me.....well, maybe, some of them I discovered on my own - but I am SURE that she has read everything on my list....I hope you enjoy them as much as I did.
Grab a hot cup of tea and enjoy!
Challenging you to engage the world with radical love:
Crazy Love by Francis Chan
Radical by David Platt
The Hole in Our Gospel by Richard Stearn
The Radical Disciple: Some Neglected Aspects of our Calling by John Stott
Biographies by people who have stepped out of the middle class bubble to make a difference:
Kisses from Katie by Katie Davis (18 year old who moved to Uganda and did AWESOME things)
Same Kind of Different as me by Ron Hall and Denver Moore (homeless shelter work in Texas- amazing story)
Seven by Jenn Hatmaker (middle class mom who starts changing her lifestyle/outlook)
Risking Everything by Sarah Courson (missionary in Bolivia)
Always Enough by Heidi Baker (missionary in Mozambique)
Bruchko by Bruce Olson (Amazon missionary)
Insanity of God by Nik Ripkin (I just started this - but it's good - so far....Mary bought 10 copies if that tells you anything......she hasn't read it yet either but she always can spot the good stuff.....)
Social Justice:
A Generous Justice by Tim Keller (my favorite Christian thinker)
The Good News about Injustice by Gary Haugen (He started the International Justice Mission to fight human trafficking/slavery)
Helping the Poor without enabling them or humiliating them: (balancing out Social Justice causes so that you are really helping people and not just alleviating your own Western guilt)
When Helping Hurts by Corbett and Fickert
Toxic Charity by Robert Lupton
"Hey, Tammy, I got something for you," she'll say as she thrusts a book into my hands.
"Is it good?" I ask - already knowing the answer.
"It's good - it's real good," she says and walks away to pass out books to some other bibliovore wh can't wait to sink their teeth into some juicy, thought-provoking words.
The thing about a book pusher is that you can NEVER outdo them. You can NEVER pass them a book because when you try - they tell you that they have already read it or just got it and are about to read it.
But, I LOVE books - so this arrangement is fine by me. This relationship is working really well.
Another cool thing about Mary is that God has been whispering to her about the same issues He has been whispering to me about: How do we as American Middle Class Christians live authentic Christian lives that really show the love of Christ rather than just be a voting block or a subculture that is sequestered from the rest of the world? How do we live lives that are consistent with the WHOLE counsel of God - not just some portions of it?
If any of you are interested in these topics, then I would like to give you a booklist of some of the great books that I have read. Basically - I would like to push on you some of the books that Mary has pushed on me.....well, maybe, some of them I discovered on my own - but I am SURE that she has read everything on my list....I hope you enjoy them as much as I did.
Grab a hot cup of tea and enjoy!
Challenging you to engage the world with radical love:
Crazy Love by Francis Chan
Radical by David Platt
The Hole in Our Gospel by Richard Stearn
The Radical Disciple: Some Neglected Aspects of our Calling by John Stott
Biographies by people who have stepped out of the middle class bubble to make a difference:
Kisses from Katie by Katie Davis (18 year old who moved to Uganda and did AWESOME things)
Same Kind of Different as me by Ron Hall and Denver Moore (homeless shelter work in Texas- amazing story)
Seven by Jenn Hatmaker (middle class mom who starts changing her lifestyle/outlook)
Risking Everything by Sarah Courson (missionary in Bolivia)
Always Enough by Heidi Baker (missionary in Mozambique)
Bruchko by Bruce Olson (Amazon missionary)
Insanity of God by Nik Ripkin (I just started this - but it's good - so far....Mary bought 10 copies if that tells you anything......she hasn't read it yet either but she always can spot the good stuff.....)
Social Justice:
A Generous Justice by Tim Keller (my favorite Christian thinker)
The Good News about Injustice by Gary Haugen (He started the International Justice Mission to fight human trafficking/slavery)
Helping the Poor without enabling them or humiliating them: (balancing out Social Justice causes so that you are really helping people and not just alleviating your own Western guilt)
When Helping Hurts by Corbett and Fickert
Toxic Charity by Robert Lupton
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